My Competitive Friend.
In the world we live in -scarcity is the buzz word.In fact come to think of it- it always was.Hence the birth of economics I guess ! But there is ancillary impact on another crucial aspect – competition.
You got a 42″ LCD – so I will buy a 46″ LED.You got a BMW -so I ll get a Merc.You got a Villa -I ll get a penthouse – are some examples on a material level.
You got a promotion -I deserve one too – You got a raise I deserve more – are some examples at work.
There are million other comparatives that come by.The question remains – what are you really competing about? What for? What will it eventually give you?
People compete with each other for supremacy,security,honor,value and a multitude of other aspects.Ironically, not having a competition is not a smart idea either.If everything was easily available to everyone there would be no room for improvement – everyone would be content with mediocrity.But lets park that thought aside for now.
So when people are on even playing grounds and compete there is one common truth – it aint going to be fair play.For starters, one is going to think that he or she is not in a position of advantage and justify the posture.’I don’t have a choice hence I need to fight for my survival’ – or I need to do this or else I am history. Whatever be the justification,the action will remain the same.
Then the next stage is where the battle actually happens. Though you must remember most battles are won or lost even before they are formally or officially declared.The mind games are always at work – sometimes literally.The judge in this case is critical – if he or she is a balanced individual then chances are he or she may take the right decision.But rest assured more often than not – this is not the case.
The battles are easier to fight if they are with your sworn enemy.But if it is a friend – then you need to take a call. should you back off? Should just be plain selfish (which of course according to you is logical thing to do and by no means selfish) So lets take the instance of a person who does back off.
‘He or she must be insane’ is the response I got when I posed this question to someone.Nucking Futs. was a close second. But then life is not about fighting.Life is not about competing all the time with all the people.You’ve got to give.You’ve got to take a step back and see if it is really worth the battle? What if you did win ? You would lose a friend.
And if you thought,this friendship is all in fairy tales now – then you shouldn’t be in this predicament in the first place.Which means you have been backstabbing your friend for a long time -misleading him or her into believing that you were indeed his or her true friend. Or it could be -that it was your plan of action all along.So whats wrong if everything fell into place? You designed it that way.
The question to think therefore is – will you really lose if you don’t get their first ? Will you really win if you do get there first?
The answer is that there is never a last first. If this was the grand finale of life,if there ever was one,then probably this is something to think about.But the reality is- that it is not. There are many many more firsts which lie ahead.Many many firsts which will mean so much more.Many more firsts which you still can do and achieve without losing a friend.
Do you know of anyone who can come back and say- that he or she has always got to all the firsts all the time? I am guessing not ( even though there are some people who are in constant denial) So in the end you are at the same even playing grounds that you started. 🙂 ie with someone who did not get all the firsts all the time.
Protect your today so that your tomorrow is in control, only the paranoid survive are all big one liners.Fortunately,life is not. In conclusion,I think somewhere in the race to win – we have forgotten to feel/care/enjoy and be with people around us rather than compete with them at all times.
So go out there,and hug a friend and say its okay – go ahead.I am with you. You will know that you would have contributed to make this world just a little bit better place to live in.